A Tribute to....Man Law #147

Man Law #147: NO WANDERING EYES IN THE SHOWER....NO EXCEPTIONS!!!!!



So sometime last week I was in the steam room at the U, enjoying a nice casual steam by myself. I get out, go turn on one of the showers because the hot water takes a while to kick in and head back in the steam room for a few.

I come out, stand right beside the entrance to the showers and am putting my sandals on as some tall lanky creature slithers right by me into the showers, and takes my already warmed up shower.

STRIKE 1 Bro, did you really just take my shower? It was obvious that I was standing right there naked about to head into that warmed up water stream...

So despite my feelings of violence I walk in and turn on another shower; all the while doing the awkward stand out of the cold water stream but have my hands in it to feel if it's warming up....As I am doing this, my spider sense kicks in and I can F*ing feel that kids eyes on me.

This little creature was checking me out in the shower....and I felt his eyes on me for like 30 seconds. It was so bad that I even had to turn my head around a little, and when I did that he did not even look away, nope, he tried to make eye contact. I swung my head back to my shower, and I heard that little creature scurry away. WTFFFFFFFF!?!?!?!

Now here is one thing I really just don't understand, regardless of this incident many times I've been in showers with strangers and felt as if they were checking out the holy grail if you will...

That is Man Law #148: No Pecka Checking if thou does not know the Pecka

Why do dudes want to know the size of a strangers junk? I mean it is one thing if it is your friend and he has Minnie Mouse in his pants and you want to make fun of him...but a dude you don't know? I'm saying that's a little on the Elton John side fellas, so cut the shit.

Bottom line, obey by the man code....Don't lock eyes with dudes in the shower, don't stare at their junk, and for the love of god don't steal their warmed up shower. These are all things that will get you killed in jail.


-J Perk