Links Bro

Some links

Manny tries playing cricket - here

How did Salman Rushdie hit this? Padma

Rihanna's Tats - yea thats an "a".

You might want to fly in the Hotelicopter. Wow.

Predator X is a wild discovery.

Can we expect to live 1000 years? Holy Eff

And how creepy is this pic? Effin owls bro. Pretty sure I hate it.





- Wolfie

Mitchum

Mitchum deoderant is so god damn powerful. For those of you who have never painted Mitchum onto your arm pits, its the strongest deoderant allowed by the CIA or god I forget which. I bought it once back in the day when I was in my pubescent prime and smelling like a large italian sub once a single bead of sweat formed on my peach fuzz. I didn't even finish the stick because it was like an anti perspirant tattoo. I literally had to scrape it off in the shower and was freaked out. So I haven't messed with the green demon since then.

Well a couple days ago I ran out of deoderant and was smelling a little ripe at Christians house. I used his Mitchum and was all good. BTW some guys look down on sharing deoderant. Well a couple days later, literally, I was still fresh and dry. I didnt know why until it clicked. Effin Mitchum works for 72 hours, its insane. So if your armpit juice smashes through old spice or right guard, it might be time to try Mitchum. A more reasonable option, that will get you through 36 is Degree. Thats what I use.

I just attached the pic. Peep that slogan.

- Wolfie

Nic Cage

Woo, this was in Simmons' mailbag today. Parts of this clip had me LOL'n. I saw Knowing last week too. Thing's like a C+. Woulda been worse without The Cage. Enjoy these shameless Japanese commercials. "Tripletssss..??"

A Tribute to....The BRO-out

Often pronounced BLOW-out coming from the sexual act these bro's enjoy performing on each other, it is time to pay homage to the BRO-out (pictured below).


This classic cut is a favorite of Mega Bro's everywhere. Made famous by the Jersey Shore Bro's in the 1970's, this haircut has become popular with both men and hideous lesbians alike.

But I digress.....(<---me trying to sound smarter than I am)

It has been far too long here on WKFTB since we have paid tribute to Legends of BROdom like the one pictured above. We really need to get back to our roots....

The shittiest/best part of this pic is that this dude thinks he looks freshhhhhhhhhhhhh. He has his crisp lineup, tanning bed skin, sweet AND1 headband, cubic zirconium earings in, and is ready to go hit Water Works wickkkedd hahhhddd duddddeeeeee.

Looking at this picture it's hard to even tell who wants the D more....this F*ing guy, or the South Shore Girls who he will bump into puking later in the evening....who will ask him for a marbbbbb and a perk 30.

So BRO-out my man...BRO-out like only you can.


J "The Bro Whisperer" Perk

Best and Worst Places to Eat

MSN ran an interestinf feature today on the best and worst major food chains. Not nescessarily fast food, they surveyed from 66 food chains nationwide and gave the highlights and lowlights of each. This ish always interests me, and those days when I'm feeling like a fat chode, I hope I can make the right choice.

Best

1.) Chick-Fil -A -- Sucks we have none of these around. Because this place is firrrreee.

2.) Subway -- See the commercials are true. Just stay away from the meatball sub.

3.) Jamba Juice -- I don't even know how this counts. Really, a smoothie place is healthy? Shocking..

4.) Au Bon Pain -- Interesting, but I would never eat here, altho the soup is ill.

5.) Boston Market -- This is based on going with turkey/sirloin/chicken with 2 veggie sides.

6.) CiCi's Pizza Buffett -- I've seen like one of these in my life. Pretty sure they have that commercial for $5 buffett. Trying to scope this out.

7.) McDonald's -- Seriously. "The Egg McMuffin remains one of the best ways to start your day in the fast-food world." How about the McGriddle???

8.) Taco Bell -- It's ironic that the place that invented "fourth meal" is on the best list. I was pumped about this and the fact that they say to stick to crunchy tacos, my fav. But then I realized they prob meant 1-3, not the 5-6 I want.

9.) Wendy's --Grilled chicken sandos and wraps are crisp here. Don't give in to the frosssstyyy at 3 am.

Worst

12.) Baskin Robins -- Wait a tic. You're trying to tell me an ice cream joint is unhealthy?!?

11.) Carl's Jr -- Doesn't offer any healthy items, which I think is a tribute to its client base.

10.) 800 Calories for a Grand Slam breakfast. If they were trying to blow me away it didn't work. That's like impressive for that massive meal.

9.) Dairy Queen -- Get outttt, another ice cream place? BTW, why don't DQs serve food in Mass.?

8.) Ruby Tuesday's -- They say to stick with the sirloin and shrimp, which prompts me to ask: Why the F wouldn't you?

7.) Chili's -- Three words: Baby. Back. Ribs.

6.) Uno's - Wooo, this place gets shit on more than any other place cept maybe Outback (more on this later). Pretty much don't EVER get the deep dish pizza.

5.) Chevy's -- Three words: What are you? Don't eat cars I guess.

4.) On the Border -- Saw one of these in Arizona. I thought Mexican was always dece healthy.

3.) Romano's Macaroni Grill -- It'll be tough to resist the temptation with all these Romano Grills on every corner.

2.) Baja Fresh -- Whatttt. This one floored me. I thought this place was ill. It's delic. And it has fresh in the title. Cmon.

1.) Applebee's, IHOP, Outback, TGI Fridays -- Or as I like to call them, Terrbs, Horrbs, Worst, and Whack. These are all bunched together because they are the only chains that still refuse to offer nutritional info. If your life isn't going the way you wanted, just head to your local Outback, order a Blooming Onion; actually make it 2. Thing is a heart attack on layaway.

Hope you enjoyed this. I like different stuff like this. You can read the whole thing here.

-The Blogfather

What a treaaaaaaaaaaaaaat

I just got home from work and found the below treat in my treat cabinet...


Cheez-it duoz....Zesty Queso and Cheddar Blanco all in the same scrumptttioussss box.

Let me tell you something...this treat is so good I almost wish it didn't exist. Because now that I know about it I'm going to be eating the F*ck out of these forever....


J PERK

The Dream Making Beats

Got this from Kanye's blog and since its Monday I decided to post it.



-Wolfie

The Kid is Back

Just got back from a 2-week West Coast excursion that ended with a sickkk weekend in Vegas. Like it or not, Vegas always delivers. It’s the best.

And besides real life, work, bills etc, that await me as I come back home, the worst of the worst is the friggin’ weather. This place saaccks compared to silky 85 and not humid everyday in Arizona and Nevada. Really, the mood better weather puts you in is incredible.

Couple highlights from Sin City:

-Danny Gans. Wowie. This guy makes ched as the “Entertainer of the Year” in Vegas. I had my doubts, but this was literally the best show I’ve ever seen. Next time your in Vegas, check him out if you can. There’s a 100% chance you’ll enjoy it and I say that no matter who you are. The guy does a million impressions, both standard and musical. It’s fire. This clip doesn’t do it justice.



-Also, saw Gym Class Heroes and Lil Wayne at The Pearl on Saturday night. Unreal. Lil Wayne can do no wrong. After he stood up the blogfathers at a Jam’N concert this fall, I thought I would be done with him. Nope. Can’t. He’s just too fire. By the way, why isn’t Gym Class more popular? They’re firrrre. For about 3 months in my life, I was convinced this was the best song in music history:



That’s it for now. More to come later.

--Nick

Music Monday

Lil Wayne - "It's been a week"


Lil Wayne - "I'm Not Human"
Sorry these two Wayne songs are pretty fire and completely different so I decided to throw em both on here...


Fall Out Boy - America's Suitehearts (Remix) Feat. Joe Budden, 88-Keys & Murs
I don't hide the fact that I sweat Fall Out Boy....and you all know that I sweat Joe Budden as well so this one was a no brainer.


Slim Thug (feat. Brisco, Maino & Red Cafe) - I Run (Remix)
I love all of these dudes.....this song is fire.


Hip-hop is fire right now.



-J Perk

Why I will never suceed in the business world....

The video is kinda choochy but I always hesitate to just throw up a post with no media attached to it. So anyways some of you may know that I am currently in my last semester in graduate school at the U (Bentley) in pursuit of an MBA (Masters in Business Administration).

As you can tell, this is a very scary thought for myself, the business world, Bentley's MBA reputation, etc. Everyday while in class I find myself wondering how the F I ever ended up here...

So yesterday in the capstone management class of my MBA, my class goes on a fieldtrip (which I completely forgot about) to a WOMEN in business panel. Obviously me being a dick forget the event, and stroll in wearing a hat and a Bentley Baseball windbreaker to a formal event. So obviously I'm getting grilled by 35 pissed off women who are looking at me like I just cancelled Grey's Anatomy. I'm literally already so embarassed (and laughing about it) that I won't even put on a name tag because I don't want anyone to know who I am....

Eventually I decide to eat a roll as I wait for these ladies to begin talking about their careers...but I realize I don't have a plate and I don't want to get up so I just take some piece of paper on the table and eat my roll above it. Afterwards I folded it up with the crumbs inside it and put it right in front of me....

The panel begins and the lady leading the conference begins by telling everyone to take a quick look at the sheet on the table which notes the careers of the speakers...well me and my boy at the same table look at each other and look at the table and immediately begin giggling like 12 year olds, trying desperately to hold in the laughter. If you have ever gone through this you know it is almost impossible to stop inappropriate laughter. People are looking at us and I'm trying to hold it in so hard...I stop for like 20 seconds, then he goes again, and then I go again. I honestly almost had to get up in the middle of it and leave.

I'm a complete failure and embarassment....

I just hope your the slightest bit entertained by it....


-J Perk

A Tribute to...The King

I sweat Lebron James, maybe not as much as my fellow blog fathers (one inparticular), but the dude is ill. More than anything else it's because he is a freak of nature...guys built like an NFL DE/LB comboand might be the fastest and most athletic in the NBA. He will be featured this Sunday night on 60 minutes...check out this short clip of him from the interview.



Guy hits shots like that just for fun I guess...I'm sure ill get back at all of you later.


-J Perk

Thursday Steal

Back to the land of audio equipment....and it only seems right since we talk about music just about half of the time here on WKFTB. Everyone needs a good boombox...especially for summer events like cookouts, tailgating, wiffleball, getting drunk in public and puking, etc.

iLive IBCD3816DT Portable 2.1-Channel CD Boombox with iPod Docking Station (Black)
$39.99.

Click HERE to grab it.

Have a good Thursday my peoplesssssssss.

-J Perk

Dream On...

OK, so I never remember my dreams. I mean, NEVER. But for some reason I remember the one I had two nights ago vividly. Figure I’d share some of it because it’s so random and just typifies the type of person I am and the ish I think about:

Alright, so I’m back in EB High walking around the halls, going classroom to classroom asking teachers where I’m supposed to be. Why you ask? Well every teacher asks that same question, to which I reply:

“I’ve been in LA for the past 2 months. Yea, I was judge on American Idol. Do you watch the show?”

For some reason they all said no.

“Oh, well, yea, I had to leave school, but no one gave me my new semester classes when I came back.”

They always said try so-and-so. Hey tried every room, braggin to students, teachers anyone. “Yea, just got back from LA. I was on American Idol. No, as a judge. Oh you didn’t see it?”

I was dece heated no one saw and finally decided to go to the office. Lady there said she couldn’t help me, at which point I flipped: “Are you serious? You have the master sheet! You know when a parent calls and needs to dismiss their kid, the sheet you have to find out which room to call? Yea, you definitely have that!”

Heated once again, I stormed out, only to cross paths with Curt Schilling, who I can only assume was at the school as some type of guest speaker.

I shook his hand. “Thanks for everything you did, Curt. I really appreciate it.”
He didn’t say anything, just tipped his cap and walked on. At which point I woke up.
“WTF…I thought..groggy and confused.”
“Aw, damn it, I wasn’t a judge on Idol?!”

--Nick

Podcast Recommendation

For those of you who use podcasts, I want to recommend the Adam Carolla Podcast. Its really funny and blowing up on itunes right now. Bill Simmons has a couple appearances on there as well this month.

For those of you who dont use podcasting, I recommend you check it out. Its great for commutes, which is what I mostly use it for. My go to podcasts are Simmons, Carolla, 60 Minutes, Two Live Stews, and ESPN Fantasy Focus.

If you rolled your eyes when you read that last one then you need to realize something. There is nothing wrong with fantasy sports. My crew has the best league of all time. Its like the best video game crossed with reality TV and being a general manager of a pro sports team. It keeps our friends close and is really competitive and funny. You really wouldn't understand unless you were in a good league but just know you cant hurt me by telling me fantasy = tool.

If anyone has any podcast recommendations pass them over to me. I feel like Kate might do podcasts, or maybe Lauzon. Actually you know what? I think we could pull off our own podcast and be good. Its something Williams and I have talked about and Im sure the other blogfather blogmother would too. Ill look into it. Imagine listening to my opinion while you were commuting or even at the gym? Might be pretty sucky but you only live once right? I dont even know what that means.

-Wolfie

More TD Celebrations

Loved Perkins post with the various TD celebrations. I like these things more than anyone. Seriously, if you like TD celebrations, I LOVE them. If you love them, I want to do them.

Here are a few clips worth mentioning. This might be the first over-the-top endzone celebration I can remember. It’s illlll:



Also, watching this makes me think that when TO is on, there’s no one I’d rather have. Putting up numbers and embarrassing the opponent. Wooo:



Wanted to post way more but the video is very limited. There should be a website devoted to this obviously but I couldn’t find anything of substance. There are thousands of clips – the TO Sharpie, the NO Saints team Leapfrog celebration from ’98 – that I wish I could watch.

--Nick

A tribute to....Monty Beisel

As you have come to expect from WKFTB, every Wednesday is show you a hot chick day. So you are probably wondering why today is former Patriot LB Monty Beisel....well folks it's because he dates hot chicks. So here are Monty's two latest squeezes.

Jennifer England:



And now his first wife, Amanda Carraway: I couldn't find many good ones in which she wasn't naked, so I apologize.



Whatever you are doing Monty, keep up the good work. We here at WKFTB salute you.


-J Perk

Jam Alert

Keri Hilson (feat Ne-Yo and Kanye)



And Check out the official new Air Yeezy's.

And Complex's article on the making of them HERE.



-Wolfie

A Tribute to....Over Celebrations

I really don't know what made me think of this one but how sweet are scoring plays in which players go nuts. I mean most of them that I see the dudes are professional athletes at some level so I don't know why they are so shocked that they did something ill that they will really pull their pants down and do the macarena. Anyways...here are a couple good ones.


Ball shattering spike

What a breakthrough celebration....


Wooooooooo


-J "Can't stop posting" Perk

Awesome TO link

Found this little gem while scanning the internet this morning.

Click HERE to go on your own Terrel Owens adventure....


-J Perk

Shaq Daddy is back at it....

Last night before I went into the C's game I was eating in Halftime Pizza (best place on earth) and saw something on Sportscenter about Shaq challenging Lebron to an entrance-off so to speak. I wish I could find the whole quote but it ended with something like "I have a million entrances in my abdulla oblongada.."



Shaq is the illest dude out there...I don't care how many times I say it.


-J Perk

Farewell, Big Schill

Say what you want about the man – and most people do – but I’ll tip my cap to Curt Schilling as he rides off into the sunset.

The big guy was always outspoken and some people didn’t like that. But he was honest, candid and most importantly: he delivered.

He came to Boston amidst much hoopla, including commercials where he said he was coming to Boston to “help break and 86-year-old curse.”

And what did he do? He helped break it. The Red Sox don’t win the World Series in 2004 without Curt Schilling. And who knows, in they lose to the Yanks that year, do they win in 2007?

I’ll never forget sitting my Boston-based BU apartment, watching the television during an agonizing rain delay (a storm that would inevitably cancel that night’s Red Sox-Yankees ALCS game). Only a few days before, Schilling was hammered by Sheffield, A-Rod, ant Matsui in the Bronx. By about the 5th batter you knew something was wrong. Schilling was dominant that year, second to Johan in the Cy Young voting. He’s usually lights out in the playoffs. He’s getting ROCKED. Something had to be wrong.

Turns out his ankle was shredded, an injury he suffered in the ALDS. But that night in Boston, even with the game called, all eyes were on Fenway. Schill was attempting to throw off a soaked bullpen mound and weird stories of clandestine medical procedures began to leak. We watched the news and heard Sox Doc, Bill Morgan was experimenting with a unique procedure on cadavers and had to think: “You’ve got to be kidding me?”

But it worked. Morgan sutured Curt’s tendon to his ankle, holding the damaged ligament in place so he could pitch another game or two. Think about that for a second. He had his frayed tendon artificially stabilized so he could pitch one, maybe two more games. He risked his health (and as it turns out, his 2005 season) because he had to deliver on his promise. How many people do you think would do that? JD “Nancy” Drew sits out with back tightness. Manny can’t remember which knee is hurt. Only a very select group of people would do what Curt did.

And that’s why, no matter your opinion of his politics, his blogging, his relationship with certain players, you have to give Big Schill credit. He told you what he was here to do – “help break an 86-year-old curse” – and he delivered.

In a day where athletes sit out with baby injuries, play for the name on the back of their jerseys, and give standard “no-answers” when talking to the media, Curt was one of kind.

Big Schill, WKFTB salutes you, and thanks you for some of the best memories of our lives.

--Nick

Kid Cudi - Superboo

In the spirit of music Monday here is Cudi's new video.



And HERE is Complex Magazine's new article (cover story) on Kanye. Remember that my two favorite people to know about are Kanye and Manny. Cant get enough of those legends.

-JW

Music Monday

Flo Rida feat. Ne-Yo "Be On You"
I sweat both of these dudes probably more than most males should.


Sean Kingston Feat Mims - Girl I Wanna Know (Remix)
I honestly put this song in there because it is blogfather Nick's favorite two artists on this earth...he sweats them both as much as I sweat Flo Rida and Ne-Yo.


Pimp C (RIP) feat. T-pain and Lil Wayne - "Let's Talk Money"
I used to sweat Pimp C...RIP


Wale feat. Lady GaGa "Chillin"
Had to show some love to GaGa on here because we lover her...also Wale is an up and comer and I think he's fire personally.


I'm already feeling these songsssssssssss.


-J Perk

Comments

Guys WTF happened? We haven't had a comment in years. If you like the site throw us a bone here. We write for fun and put some real hours in. Just hook us up with a few comments. I know it might take 30 seconds but we would appreciate the exhausting effort. I legit check every post for comments a few times a day and I've just been seeing 0's for weeks now, its depressing. Thats the only way we know if people are reading and alive. Let me know if you agree or disagree with something I post by commenting. Maybe you've got an opinion yourself, who knows. Alright I'll stop begging but I had to say something with all these perfect games we've been throwing, blows.

-Wolfie

Injury Updates - Red Sox

An unbelievable article I read weekly called Under The Knife by Will Carroll had a few Red Sox notes so I figured I would post it on the blog. Will Carroll is a doctor or sports medicine specialist or whatever that gets paid to write and let people know the deal with sports injuries. You need to pay to subscribe and I've heard from Gammons that every GM in baseball reads UTK. Anyway, here are the Sox paragraphs with Penny, Smoltz, and Youk. The news was good for Smoltz so just give the picture above a fist pound.

Boston's attempt to bring in some risky but talented pitchers didn't look like a good gamble earlier this spring, but now there's hope. Penny was not only able to get out onto the mound and throw well, he did it on a five-day schedule. His command and velocity both improved, and he had his fastball up into the mid-90s. There are still questions about how well Penny can hold up over a series of starts, but these positive steps give some indication that he could produce long enough to get Smoltz into the picture. Penny's next test will be on Monday when he's scheduled to throw again. If that goes well, he might be pitching against big-leaguers by the end of the week. Smoltz is continuing his rehab and looking toward a June return, though he could be up on a mound before the Sox head back to Boston. The toughest task Smoltz faces now might be maintaining his patience.

Red Sox fans continue to hate the Classic, but Youkilis came limping home on a play that could have just as easily happened in Ft. Myers as in Miami. In fact, Youkilis leaked that this had been going on pre-wbc, the kind of candor we don't normally get from Boston. The Sox were being very careful, and had him undergo an MRI to determine the extent of the damage. Sources tell me that Youkilis' ankle is "ugly on the outside, but not so bad on the inside." The early word is that he's likely to miss a week to ten days, and that he'll be ready for Opening Day, assuming of course that there are no setbacks in his rehab. Given that this is a chronic problem more than a traumatic one, there's little reason to believe he'll have any major problems in the short term, but the team is looking to make sure that Youkilis' admitted lack of self-awareness doesn't hurt him. Maybe Youkilis learned something from Chipper Jones.

-Wolfie

Hey, you can always strip

Two industries that are benefiting from America’s economic downturn? Stripping and the porn industry, according to this sweet article on MSN.

You can check the link and read the whole thing, but I took the liberty of giving you the best parts here:

“Employers across the adult entertainment industry say they’re seeing an influx of applications from women who…are attracted by the promise of flexible schedules and fast cash. Many have college degrees and held white-collar jobs until the economy soured.”
-Well, yea, that’s the thing and strip clubs and porn. Guys will spend their last dollars on that ish. And there’s nothing a good CEO likes more than a sweet stripper. Obviously because it’s illegal, we have no figures on hookers. But if I had to guess, I’d say that industry is thriving as well.

“’You’re seeing a lot more beautiful women who are eligible to do so many other things,’ said Gus Poulos, general manager of New York City’s Sin City gentleman’s club.”
--But stripping is easy and you make loooot. How much loot? See this:

“Dancers at the upscale Rick’s Caberet clubs in New York City and Miami can make $100,000 to $300,000 a year — in cash — even with the economic downturn, club spokesman Allan Priaulx said.”
-WTF…are you kidding me? How is that even possible. How much is a lap dance there? $100? $300?

A little local flavor:
“Rhode Island’s Foxy Lady held a job fair Saturday, seeking to fill about 35 positions for dancers, masseuses, bartenders and bouncers. The Providence Journal reported that more than 150 job seekers showed up to apply for work at the strip club.”
--Ill career fair

“Vivid Entertainment’s Hirsch said the number of women in his business has doubled in the last couple years, with roughly 800 working as adult actresses. ‘It is more competitive than I’ve seen it in 25 years,’ he said.”
-And you know what that means? With come competition should come a better product. No uggs in porn anymore.



--Nick

Its not just dancing

Just letting you guys know my 2 cents here. If you need an opinion you can steal this one. Or you can completely disagree, its up to you. Lady GaGa is really good. You don't have to like her but its true. When I heard "Just Dance" and then got it drilled into my head I was pretty pissed and biased towards her, but that wasn't fair at all. A couple people who know music cued me in that she was pretty much a beast. In an industry full of Soldier Boy Tell Ems, she is for real . She has a unique style and wears the shades to cover up because shes not really a looker without them but its also part of her charisma/swag, no joke. She has a huge voice and you can tell because whenever anyone tries to cover Just Dance they can't match up. If you aren't sick of Poker Face by now you probably will be soon but thats just because shes exploding. Shes not a one or two hit wonder. She was signed to Def Jam when she was 19, got released, penned for a bunch of artists including Pussycat Dolls, then Akon scooped her up to do her album. Research her or scan her youtube clips if you would like to know more.

She is impressive live.





-Wolfie

Gus Johnson: Always Intense

By now you've grown accustomed to the intensity and passion of CBS play-by-play announced Gus Johnson. But did you realize he was just as intense off the court?

Apparently Big Gus was 'cuffed in a Memphis restaurant after getting into a confrontation with the manager. And not just a verbal confrontation, Johnson wrestled around with the 6-foot-2 manager, who Gus initially berated for crummy service.

You can read the full report of the incident on Deadspin.

-Nick

Youk = So Sexy

Youk was in Men's Journal recently listed as one of the ugliest athletes in the world, rlol. I guess he has the last laugh though as his fiance or wife or whatever is a hot, wealthy, italian woman named Enza. Actually nah I take that back. Im sayin that still blows. Noone wants to be called out as the guy who most resembles a hideous beast. Even if it is true. And even if you still landed a cute girl.

"Youk has only three body parts, all hideously oversized: an enormous set of gnomish, bushy forearms; a massive, casaba melon–size white head; and a cauldronlike belly. He has a truly awesome bristle of thick red chin hair that makes his face look like a cross between a vagina and something out of The Hobbit."



-Wolfie

Challenge You To A Duel

Edit: I ended up ranting and this post ran long. I apologize for that but it should still entertain you. Actually I know some of you will like it because some of you are down with the founding fathers. Its not dry either. Eh, actually some of you won't like it but its cool. I sum up the American revolution in like 3 sentences and talk about how cool duels are. OK go read now... or skip to the bottom and watch some baked out Afghani poppin off his gun.

I was thinking about what exactly is badass in the world the other day and I remembered something I was always intrigued by that fell out of favor over 100 years ago, Duels. Duels were the ultimate challenge and really only had to do with one thing. Honor. If someone was disrespecting you blatantly, like filling your wives mouth with hay and dusting her off in the barn, then what you do is let everyone know you aren't a pushover by publicly challenging that bastard to a life risking duel. You march in opposite directions for a set number of steps then spin around and blaze a bullet at the dude who was toolin on you.

So lets take the wife example. You can think of your options like a poker game. In this situation challenging him to the duel is like you making a big bet into him. If that guy folds (declines the challenge) then he doesn't have to risk his life, but probably has to apologize to you and hes pretty much a punk around town with no honor. And back in those days having no honor was like having bad credit plus raunchy body odor at the same time for the rest of your life. Lastly, he can call your bet (accept the challenge) and risk his life but prove hes no busta.

Actually, there is a last option when challenged. You can up the ante and reraise him by telling him you accept the challenge and when you win youre going to bone his wife again with his socks on, but that trash talk was rare and risky. Honor was a touchy thing back then and someone might kill you on the spot. But if you did that and pulled it off you would become a legend behind closed doors and probably have a gun or drink named after you. Thing is if you lose you look like Hasselbeck in the playoffs and you don't just look like a chooch, you die and noone goes to your funeral.

So you've gotten yourself into a duel. You are back to back with the opponent and you have just started your walk, which is a set number of paces before you turn and burn. At this point anything can be running through your head depending what kind of man you are and how well you've prepared for this moment in your life. It could be anything from "What a great day to kill or be killed MWA HA HA!" to "I wonder if they'll shoot me in the back if I run away right now" Im sure most fell somewhere in the middle but it must have been scary when realization sets in. After that the thinking is done and its simple, you turn and fire. Whatever happens happens.

Im saying I would definitely be prepared. I would practice dueling for years and have set strategies no doubt. Oh yea one more sweet rule I found. You can't challenge noblemen to a duel if you are a bum, doesn't work like that. Here is a great quote from the famous wikipedia. If a gentleman was insulted by a person of lower class, he would not duel him, but would beat him with a cane, riding crop, a whip or have his servants do so. Now thats pimp.

We brought duels over here from Europe but I think we Americanized them. I bet it wasn't as formal. I picture that in Europe you could disrespect some other man's tea or socks and before you knew it a leather glove was smacking your face and you are outside being handed your gun (that was gonna jam) for a duel. Well I made that all up but its how I picture those royal peacocks rolling. See at that point it was all about what family you were born into in Europe. The ballas were chooches. In America it was the opposite. Let me talk a little about history before I sign off.

Noone touches the founding fathers in terms of ultimate swag and respect. A successful revolution is at the top of the accomplishment pyramid. If they only taught it to us simpler in school. I'll tell you what happened right now so fast and informal. OK, heres the key the teachers or text doesnt talk about enough. When another country occupies land beyond its boundaries and runs shit its called colonialism and its always bad. People get exploited and/or killed, colonizers take money and force culture on the colonies. Theres no way around it, it always happens, its human nature, imperialism, whatever. So around 250 years ago we were an english colony and it was dece until we really started getting pwned with taxes. We got heated and wanted representatives if we were being taxed but thats not cool when youre slaves so the brits didn't give us rights and we decided to fight. Behind the scenes we had an amazing group of founding fathers and freedom fighters. Anyway, we were such a pain in the ass that England was like "YO FUK DIS" and bounced cause we were costing them more money than they could steal from us. Then the founding fathers sat down and out of fresh paper, gallons of ink, and their favorite quill pens, they produced a document called the US constitution. From there this country was off on a wild ride of affluence, war, and everything in between for the next 250 years. Ultimately we became as great a superpower as this planet has ever seen, Thats America kids. Always remember it started with a government that needed to be put in check.

Read A Peoples History Of The United States by Howard Zinn if you like this kind of stuff and want to know the real story instead of the lies in our text books. Remember that the winners of wars are the ones who write the text books. The Native American, African American, and English histories of America are probably pretty different. Our history books don't dwell on stuff like The Ludlow Massacre.

I'll leave you with a pretty insane clip of weed and war. This shit isn't a game.



-Wolfie

Bracket Busted & Obama on Leno

TUSCON, AZ – OK, so my bracket is officially busted. I and another WKFTB who I will not mention had West Virginia in the Elite 8. They just got crundled by Dayton. Yup, Dayton. The same Dayton who lost to U-friggin-Mass this year. Unreal. I still think West Virginia would have beat Kansas if they advanced. Boggles my mind how a Big East team lost to an A-10 one. Wow. Just job, guys.

It’s been a tough day for the blogfather. Lost close ones with Utah St. and Tennessee. Not that those really matters, just salt on the wound at this point. I guess I could still have a shot in a few pools. Florida St. anyone? But it’s not looking good. I love hearing people’s March Madness success/sob stories, so by all means, give an update on how you’re doing in the comment sections.

-Another reason I love Southwest: I just change my flights to stay in Zona for a few more days then fly direct from here to Vegas. Instead of wasting 8 hours flying Saturday then again from Provi to Vegas on Thursday, I figured I’d cut out the middle ish. Well, not only did they do it for me, they actually credited my account because one short jump from AZ to Nevada is a lot cheaper than two cross country flights. Just livin the dream. You might never see me againnnnnn.

-Saw the B’s blew another third period lead last night. Wow, they’re struggling. Looking more and more like a first round exit as we approach the stretch run.

-How ill is this, btw. I keep seeing a commercial that uses this clip during March Madness. Not even sure what the commercial is selling but I found the real clip on YouTube. Wayyyooo:



Don’t know if you’ve had a chance to check this out yet, but Obama was on Leno last night. So what if he hasn’t actually done a thing, guy’s always killing it in interviews at least:



--Nick

Ali G kinda kills it

It's long I know but there are some laughs in there. I figured I'd throw it up there since I've featured the Spice Girls on here a couple times. Ali G is the riskiest dude....asks Beckham if his wife takes it up the butt rlolllllllll.


-J Perk

A Tribute to....The Madness Braaaa

There honestly might not be anything better than March Madness. For me at least I know it is right there with the World Series and Super Bowl. The fact that its college kids going 100% without being paid is what really makes it what it is. Here is a great chooch video for all to enjoy.


My bad for the quality of my posts lately, I have had a ton of other work all week and I'm going to go even further for an excuse and say yesterday was my birthday so I only threw one half ass post up there. In the coming days I will be back on this full time...


-J Perk

The Most Wonderful Time of the Yeahhhh

Wooooo...it's finally here. The event that costs the American economy $3.8 billion in lost productivity, but supplies 45948475 billion in illness. Ladies and Gents, the 2009 NCAA March Madness tournament.

In honor of today's Holiday (I've skipped class/work for the past 7 tourneys I think) here's a lil "best of" vid. Young Nash and Jordan kill me in this thing:



George Mason - now that was a crazy bracket buster. Also, I need so digging and Slate Magazine did a little piece saying the $3.8 billion figure was wayyy overblown, basically a panic number by a business advisory firm who specializes in "productivity." Kind of interesting; I know Wolfie will peep it.

So good luck with your brackets (unless you're in a pool with me). Enjoy the first of two of the best days of the young new year.

--Nick

Thursday Steal(s)

Right into the deals...

As we creep closer to warmer weather it is always important for you to have the right shades on. This pair of Spy's "Twiggy" has a little flavor and the price is right at $20.00. (Regularly $100.00) Also be sure to check out SPY OPTIConline and click on the "unreal deal of the week" tab. Good stuff there.

Click HERE to get this deal...different colors available.

This next deal is a must have for all you aspiring Ninja's / Samurai's like myself. If it's happened once, it's must have happened a thousand times to me that I've been in a situation where I need a Samurai Sword. So I bring you this 27' inch Old World Samurai Sword for your next ninja battle.

Click HERE and order this sword for only $34.99.

Yes I have lost my mind...Happy March Madness to you all.


-J Perk

Fashion Power Couple

It looks like KanYe is back from his 808 and heartbreak and in a new relationship. Take a look at fashion's hottest couple. Amber Rose is a fashion model with a unique look. And by unique I mean she has a wiffle. I'm sure the reviews will be mixed on her. Personally I think shes a stunner, and somewhat intimidating. I sort of think of her like a ridiculously over the top, but still fly, (No I don't use fly in real life convos) piece of clothing. In the sense that I know I couldn't pull it off but am still allowed to think its hot. Kanye pulls her off. They look like such a fashion power couple. just because I think its hot doesn't mean I can pull it off.

I think I am really fascinated with savants. Its probably why Manny and Kanye are two of the most interesting people on the planet to me. More-so with artists, but it can happen to anyone whos is extremely talented and tapped into a part of the brain that the rest of us are not privy to. Michael Jackson is the quintessential example of it. He was the Jordan of popular music but thats another post. The point is that you can be so creative that you start to disconnect with the rest of the world and eventually spin off of it and fly into space. Its going to be fun following Kanye's journey as he gets older because trust me, he's not coming back to this planet.

Hot Song: Ryan Leslie - Irina

Wolfie

Western Round-Up

TUCSON, AZ -- Sorry for being the invisible man. Just got caught up with the blog this morning and kudos to everyone else for churning out good material while I've been slacking.

It's not 9 yet over here so sorry if I'm a little groggy. It his, however, already 60 degrees.

-I'm a big fan of Southwest Airlines, I think. The seats are comfy, you get more leg room then most carriers, plus there's no baggage fee, they still give out snacks, drinks are free, and, as Kate's post below shows, they always are a little different on the mic. The laid-back atmosphere makes you feel chill about flying. And I haven't even mentioned the main reason you fly them yet: it's probably the cheapest rate around. Seriously how can you compete? They're moving into Logan in a few months, and I honestly can't imagine me flying anyone else.

-That new Mac commercial about the 8-hour battery is crazy. I got an 8-minute one right now. Comp is about a year and half old and the battery is toast. Nice lil $80 slap in the face every few years. Might be scopping a MacBook.

-How weird is it that Arizona doesn't even abide by Daylight Savings? Just doesn't do it. Thing switched from being 2 to 3 hours behind EST depending on the time of year. TV schedules? Forget it. So hard to figure out. Because you can't go by central time or pacific either. Mountain? Don't even know what's in that time zone. Missed the first hour of Idol last night because it started at 7. Let's see if it starts at 8 EST and it's "live" you'd figure 5 over here. Only that would be way to early, so maybe they just wait until 8 and show it taped. Nope, throw it on at 7 for some reason.

-Last night's US-PR game was incred. Anyone who still doubts that these dudes do care about this....well I don't even need to explain it. I love how the media gets one idea in its head and everyone collectively runs with it. "The WBC is at the wrong time." "The players don't care." "They want to go back to spring training." Really? Why don't you try and watch again. It's good baseball and I see dudes fist pumping, breaking up double plays, celebrating and making diving grabs. Oh, yea I'd much rather have spring training...give me a break.

-The B's have certainly come back down to earth. I guess I team with young studs (Krejic, Wheeler, Kessel, etc.) has to hit a wall at some point. Kessel has picked it back up, but it's the performance of the other two (along with linemate Michael Ryder) that should dictate how far Boston goes in the playoffs.

-Love the Julius Peppers rumors. An underrated move that went under the radar this weekend was the signing of Joey Galloway. Guy was still a beast two years ago, but struggled through injuries last year. Should be a good outside threat with Greg Lewis. You gotta like Moss, Welker, Galloway, Lewis. Read this Tony Mazz piece if you want to get pumped about the Pats; or if you are a Pats hater, see how far you can read until you back-body drop your computer.

-Sox cut Josh Bard today. Guy was having a good spring, hitting over .400 with a homer, but face it: dude saaaccckks. Is it Kottaras who will step into the backup role? Most likely. The Sox like his power from the left side and considering that's the side where 'Tek struggles, they would seem to be better complements. Still, with a surplus of young arms (Bucholtz, Bowden, Daniel Bard) you can never rule out a trade.

-Not even gonna mention the Celts. So mad at all the losses. KG...come baccckkkk brrooooo.

-Seacrest, out..

A Tribute to...A Southern Belle

First off I want to say that I am sorry for my inconsistent posting lately. I've had a lot of school work and yesterday was spent getting green and going to the Lil Wayne, T-pain, Gym Class Heroes, and Keri Hilson concert.

So anyways, it is a known fact that any girl with a southern accent is an automatic +3. (A girl that would normally be a 7 is therefore a 10...stay with me).

With that in mind I give you Hillary Fisher.


I mean Hillary probably isn't in anything famous yet, but she should be.


I want someone to please tell me why the girls in the South are hotter than the girls up here? Is it the Sun? The Water? The Nascar???? What the F is it?


All I know is girls from the North simply do not look like this....and trust me I am not judging because I am certainly no 6 pack cover model myself (Unless the cover is about drinking beers and I could be on it with an ACTUAL 6 pack).


Enjoy your hump day everyone...I'll get back at you all later on.


-J-Perk

A-Roid's DETAILS Cover.

I'm appreciating the Jesus reference, whoever let that slip by is genius.

Then this one is just weird, I thought it was Madonna at first.

Happy St. Patrick's Day. Drink a Guinness for me, I'm stuck in a cubicle until 5.

-Kate

Music Monday/Tuesday Part 2

Alright my bad on slacking on Music Monday...I just got home from work and realized I didn't do anything. I'm also going to double slack and do something different and just put up a couple songs I've been feeling over the past month that I haven't put up here yet...let me know if you hate it, for real.

Young Jeezy - "Uh Huh"
Jeezy is in my top 5 right now...dude kills it


Cam'ron - "Cooking Up"
FAST FORWARD to 1:35 for the music video, but this dude is back and has punch lines for days, fiyyyyyyaaahhhhhhh


Sean Kingston ft. Lil Wayne -"I'm at War"
Don't know what to say...other than flammmmmmmesssssssssss


Rich Boy ft. Polow Da Don - "Drop"
Alright honestly, I could read the newspaper over this beat and it would be fiyahhhh.
Also an ill Kid CuDi freestyle to this, go find it on youtube.


Switched it up and didn't hit you with the absolute newest, my bad if you hate it.


-J Perk

Fresh Prince of SouthWest -Air.

This guy just impressed me. The middle-aged men in the first two rows really made this video complete. Then of course the guy throwing up gangs signs at the end.

Whats Up NEOOOWW BRO?!?

Possibly favorite clip ever.



-Wolfie

Peppers To NE ???!

Julius Peppers to New England is probably going to happen. Wow this rules.

-Wolfie

Random Thoughts

-How weird is it that people were chiefing butts on airplanes up until about 20 yrs ago? Just puffin cigs in the sky and blowin the smoke in my eyes as a baby. I heard someone mention it on a podcast recently and it was a funny mental image to me.

-My friend pointed this out to me the other day and I was sort of in shock when I looked closer and confirmed it. Chris Brown is a hunchback folks. Check it out for yourself. I always thought he was just jacking his head forward when he finished a dance routine as a stance but nah thats his natural posture. Once you see what I mean it makes him way less cool. Being a hunch and punching your girl in the eye sucks.

-Dhani Jones was always a little different than your average NFL middle linebacker. I knew he liked to travel, was interested in fashion, and do different things. I just learned he has a show on the Travel Channel where he goes around the globe and trains in a country's sport and then competes in it. Actually looks pretty good. It premieres tonight at 9pm, travel channel, and he goes to Thailand for some Muay Thai training.

-I love when the Sox make sweet deals like the one with Lester (5yrs/30m)

-Little trick/tip for ya. If you pour a big ass bowl of cereal, toss an ice cube or two in there. It makes all the difference. Ice cold milk is underrated.

-UFC 97 Official Card was released this weekend.

• Middleweight champ Anderson Silva vs. Thales Leites
• Chuck Liddell vs. Mauricio "Shogun" Rua
• Krzysztof Soszynski vs. Brian Stann
• Cheick Kongo vs. Antoni Hardonk
• Luis Cane vs. Steve Cantwell

Music: I bought the Ryan Leslie CD the other day and its really good.


-Wolfie

Music Monday Part 1

Alright I'm at work right now and won't be able to put up my usual Music Monday post until a little later on...but for now I'm hitting you with some music news that I came across today.

As some of you may know (I'm pretty sure Nick said something about it on here recently) Eminem's album Relapse is scheduled for relase May 19th. What I did not know was the following taken from MTV News:

"Eminem's Relapse Set For May ReleaseSecond album, Relapse 2, will drop later in the year.
By Shaheem Reid


"Does Eminem know how to make a comeback or does he know how to make a comeback? He's giving his patient fans more than what they bargained for. Interscope Records announced Thursday (March 5) that Slim Shady is dropping two albums this year, Relapse and Relapse 2.

The first LP has been slated for May 19, with a single and video premiering on radio and television airwaves on April 7. It sounds like this record will be in addition to "Crack a Bottle," which has already gone #1. The video for that hit should drop soon.

Relapse 2 doesn't have a release date yet, but in a statement, Em said that he's currently in the studio working on that project and it will come out in the second half of this year.



"A lot of people were expecting Relapse to drop last year," Eminem said in the press release. "I was one of them. Then Dre and I went back in the studio in September for a few days, and that turned into six months. We were on such a roll; we wound up with a ton of new music produced by Dre. Putting out Relapse 2 will let everyone get all of the best stuff."

It's been more than four years since Em's last solo LP, Encore. Verses, let alone full songs, from the acclaimed star have been sparse. Last year, Em dropped a freestyle called "I'm Having a Relapse" while promoting his autobiography, "Eminem: The Way I Am." The rhymes were crisp and let everyone know he wasn't missing a step.

Besides re-emerging as an artist, the Detroit rap legend will have his hands full as an executive this year. 50 Cent told MTV News last week that he plans to put out his Before I Self Destruct album this summer on the heels of Relapse. 50 said he was waiting for Dr. Dre to finish up with Em so they could complete work on Self Destruct.

Interscope didn't clarify what the announcement of Relapse 2 might mean for the release of Dre's upcoming Detox. Several unfinished tracks from Dre's record have leaked over the past few weeks. A handful of the bootlegged songs feature T.I. referencing vocals for the Doc.

While May 19 was also the last scheduled release date for Lil Wayne's rock-oriented Rebirth album, a label spokesperson told MTV News on Thursday that the album was recently moved to "TBD."

So there you have it folks...Relapse 2 will be on the way in 2009 as well. Also interesting that Lil Wayne switched up his album release date. Em and Weezy competing in the same week isn't something either side wants im sure.


-J Perk

Ms Kerrii Baaaby

Im a fan of Keri Hilson. Shes a stunner and also very talented. Most people think she is just some new artist with good looks who was lucky enough to get on a song with Weezy (Turnin Me On) but nah shes been around, just mostly behind the scenes as a songwriter. She has written for people such as Ciara, Ludacris, Usher, and Britney. Right now her solo career is taking off.

Here is her new video with an appearance by Kanye as the love interest:



Here is a secret gem video. Timbo with Nicole Scherziner and Keri Hilson. Those two honeydips will melt your comp screen.



-Wolfie