I know....it's a shocking statistic. It is likely that there are a few of you are reading this and thinking "Oh no, these guys have finally caught on to the dark world of the Bro's!?!?!" Yes we have Bro...yes we have. This is why I'm pleading with all of you...we have to do our part in this. Next time you see a Bro out at a party you need to one punch him, or maybe wait until he's black out drunk off 7 Natty Ice's and then tie his hands and legs together and throw him into a body of water....maybe extreme......but we have to let them know that we as Non-Bro's will not put up with their Bro-nanigans any longer. Anyways...I've rambled on for far too long...here is our investigative report on Bro-Rape.
Wow. A truly eye opening investigative report...if you are a Bro reading this make sure to guard yourself against any and all forms of Bro Rape. The first step is not to allow fellow Bro's come over and "Bro-out" with you at any time. The second step is to take a long look in the mirror, un-spike that hair that took you 20 minutes to complete using 3 bottles of hair gel, take off that pooka shell necklace (yes that means YOU Nick), put down that Dave Matthews greatest hits album, take off your "Girls like me" Abercrombie graphic shirt, and think about who you really are as a person. Because the best way to combat Bro rape is to not be a Bro in the first place...so please remember that. The next time your in an internet chat room and some dude with the screen name BroOut2000 asks to come over and play beruit and listen to the new Jack Johnson, you need to say no Bro, you cannot Bro Rape me.
I hope you found the above information very helpful in preventing the growing trend of B R's that are sweeping the nation.
-J Perk
Posts
Wow, everyone should watch that entire clip because it's outstanding.
ReplyDelete"What's this, a six pack of Natty Light??"
"I, uh..get thirsty.."
"Did you spray axe body spray on this?"
"A can and a half..."