Oregon Trail & Wolfenstein

OK, so I was a little lazy/under the weather yesterday and didn't get to post. I know, I know, my inbox was flooded with angry emails from distraught readers from Marshfield to California asking just what the deal was.

Thankfully, we saw a strong return from Jared as he and Jake picked up the slack big time. There was even an unreal video posted up from Kate, who may or may not still be fretting over her performance review.

Anyway, to make up for my transgressions, I'm giving you a double dose of the throwback post. I have a few more words to say about Oregon Trail and I couldn't wait to save it for next week.

First, let me "size up the situation." At one point in your life, Oregon Trail was the best thing you could do, the ultimate reward for passing in a worksheet ahead of the rest of the class. If you got some free time on the huge old-school PCs, you were doing one thing: playing Oregon Trail.

The diseases and perils of travel always got you. From broken arms to malaria, someone in your group always got pwned. This was pretty realistic. I mean, traveling in the 1800s was no easy task. But the one thing I always hated was when you went hunting and beasted like 1,200 pounds of meat -- maybe caught the buffalo or something -- then they told you it was too much to bring back.

Really? We're traveling cross-country, ammo is getting low and you're telling me I can't bring back all this meat? Punishing me for beasting these animals and being ill at hunting? Let's make room for this shit. Peace out this barrel here, or maybe leave Mary with the broken arm alongside the trail because the bitch is no help to us anyway. Either way, I'm bringing this delicious meat treat.

---The second thing I had to bring up was another game from the past: Wolfenstein. This was a little bit after Oregon Trail, but not much. Back when everything didn't have to be politically correct and you could just blast away Nazis and Germans who were stereotyped. Pretty sure these graphics were breakthrough at the time:

The blood and gore in this game were also pretty risky for the generation period. As your health was going down, remember how your guy's face at the middle bottom screen would get more and more battered and bruised? Lol, love that touch. Look at that bro face btw. Guy's a savage.

This game paved the way for first-person shooters. With sweet weapons and a much of different levels, it set the tone for the basic hunt and kill shooters that game after it.

And OH MY GOD, don't EVER let your guard down at the end of the game, because you do not want to face this man unprepared:

Haha...one of the best pics on the Internet. Look at that dude heavily armed bull-rushing you. Shit, might have to scoop this game...

--Nick

Thursday Throwback: NBA Jam

(Every Thursday, starting today, WKFTB will bring you a throwback, something that reminds us of our late-80s-early-90s childhood. Today's edition: NBA Jam).

Pretty sure every gamer had this for Sega or Super NES. And don't even get me started on the arcade version -- could bang out 5 hours on that thing right this second.

I remember everything about this game, from the opening screen (above) to the Iguana logo thing after that, the announced Acclaim kept for NFL Blitz and, of course, the sweet sayings which I still try to incorporate into my life today ("Can't buy a bucket!" "He's Heating up!")

And don't forget when you could do this, thanks to Shaq Daddy's flirtation with crushing backboard. RLOL at the glass breaking sound effects:



The best thing to hear:



Haha remember all the hidden codes too? You could like play with Clinton and Al Gore somehow. So ill.

For some reason I couldn't find a vid for the best phrase known to gaming: BOOM SHAKA LAKA!

Who was your squad? I'd roll with Kemp and Payton. Sonics were nice and I think everyone rolled with them back then. Lot of people liked the Bulls, but without MJ, F that. Stockton and Malone were a great duo too. Pretty sure the Celtics were the worst. Dee Brown and Dino Raja? Nah, bro. If you played, post your duo below.

--Nick

Williams' World

It’s about time for an info-style post:

-When’s it time to call it quits playing video games? Is it just one of those things like rap music where your generation grows up with it so it’s fine to just keep doing it? I don’t know the right answer, but I’m 23 and I’m still swearing my ass off trying to beat bosses.

-What’s with those DVD cases with the two flaps that click in to secure it shut? The other way wasn’t working? I’m not too sure why this is necessary. Where DVDs spilling out all over the place? I’m pretty sure it just prevents me from opening it the very first time I try. But maybe I’m just a caveman.

-I would love to know the people who make the YouTube clips with songs that don’t have music videos and then add various pictures of the artists. Who the hell makes this things? I won’t say anything bad about them because it’s awesome to just Google a new song and have it always be right there on YouTube, but I just can’t picture the type of person who does it. Especially the people who match up pictures with lyrics. Like the guy will say “locked up” and there will be a picture of steel bars. Who’s gangster enough to love this music but nerdy enough to make these vids?

-I’ve tried to keep a personal calendar to keep me organized, but found that it’s more work to update the friggin calendar than it is to remember stuff. I remember in college, sitting next to girls and they would literally have their entire weeks planned out by the hour. Oh, you need to make a note for lunch? How about this: JUST EAST WHEN YOUR HUNGRY. Don’t need to plan that shit. Or even better, the 6PM-10PM “Study for Anthropology Test” or something similar. What the hell? If the test is the next day you better know automatically to study for it. And if you’re studying for four hours, you better get a fuckin A+.

Other things you should know:

-Alex Cora is about to sign with the Mets.

-Dave Meggett (and NFL ’95 favorite of mine) is being charged with rape. Wonder what the former Pats RB/KR has been up to? Here:

“The woman told police she woke up at 1 a.m. Tuesday and found a man she knew as "Mike" sitting on her bed, according to an incident report. The man demanded that she repay $200 she owed him and raped her when she said she didn't have the money, police said.

“Afterward, the man told her he was sorry and that she didn't have to repay him. The woman drove herself to the hospital, where Meggett later met her and was arrested, according to police records”

-You NEED to see this Lebron James shot from last night if you haven’t yet. Was there any doubt it wasn’t going in? The announcing team must be from Memphis though, because they remain comatose throughout the whole thing.